Category Archives: rant

Don’t Speak……Don’t Tell Me ’cause It Hurts. What NOT To Say To Someone Chronically Ill. Part Two.

Here is the SECOND part of a series. Please read the first part directly below this one first, although it is not absolutely necessary. If this is the only one you have the interest or patience for, it will do the job.

effingfibro

8.   “You’ve brought this on yourself. You were so determined to be ill that you’ve talked yourself into it.” Yeah……cos I’ve got THAT much control over every one of my involuntary physiological processes…I must be some kind of Indian Guru or something. Where’s my medal? And if I’ve got such an awesome level of control over my health, how come I can’t make myself well again? I wasn’t “determined to be ill,” you moron; I just knew something wasn’t right a long time before any of you did because I live in this body. Do you seriously think I purposely, deliberately screwed up my happy, productive, independent, joyful life? The one I had Before All This? There is no upside to be crippled by some mysterious illness that no-one can find a cure for. Well, maybe one: it strips away shallow friendship, sorts out the real “friends” from the…

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Don’t Speak……Don’t Tell Me ’cause It Hurts. What NOT To Say To Chronically Ill People. Part One.

There are hundreds or thousands of people like us out there. I am “luckier” than most in that I have irrefutable medical proof that I have a rare chronic disorder. Many of us are not that lucky. Think before you judge and speak people! Otherwise, you richly deserve whatever diatribe you have triggered!  And I want to be there to watch you squirm, and if you are not squirming enough, I’ll see what I can do to remedy that!

effingfibro

Chronically fit and well people (and, I suspect, those with a degree of health issues that also have escaped formal dx for whatever reason) simply do NOT understand chronic illness. They just don’t.

This is evidenced by the ridiculous things they trundle out for our “benefit”, their pearls of wisdom that are supposed to either encourage us or belittle us into some sort of miraculous spontaneous recovery from whatever ails us, which is usually something really quite minor, in their opinion.

Here are just some of the things I am sick to death and back of hearing:

1.   “You sleep too much, that’s your problem!”  Absurd. Anyone with a working brain cell will tell you that (sleeping pills notwithstanding) it is literally impossible to MAKE yourself sleep. It can’t be done. If it could, insomnia wouldn’t exist. We sleep because our bodies are knackered, exhausted, wiped-out, fatigued, tired, whatever…

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My Dire-y 06/03/2015, Pooped

Now that Holly the cat has your attention (cheap trick, I know.  She has absolutely nothing to do with this blog post).

I had a very good, and very tiring day today. I have a good friend that I have seen very seldom, for far too long. We definitely love each other, and each other’s company. Through a set of very unfortunate circumstances, she had to have her left leg amputated. I am sure it has been a terribly rough time for her, readjusting to life in a wheelchair, and learning to use a prosthesis. Right now she can only walk a short distance on it, but is diligently practicing to improve. We are somewhat similar in personality, at least in the fact that we are both intellectual, and snarky….very snarky. In fact, the word snarktankerous very perfectly describes my own personality.

One of the things she does for the pure pleasure of it is gardening, so off to Lowes we went for herbs, pots, and dirt….not just any dirt, but “special” dirt, specifically formulated with the greatest of care to maximize the quality of life for a few lucky plants. These plants should be exceedingly grateful that they are being tended by my long-time friend.

Now, in case you don’t know me from reading my past blog posts, I will tell you that I have a rare disorder which eats up my motor nerves, so I am now much weaker than I should be, and have muscle atrophy as a result. Most of the trouble is in my left hand/arm and right leg. If I fall, I cannot get up unless there is a chair, wall, or other object to grab and push on with my hands/arms because of the weakness of my legs. Also, my left hand is so weak that I have lost probably 85% of its normal function. Oh, and if that isn’t enough, I am extremely fatigued ALL the time. On bad days, I simply don’t have the energy to leave the house, and spend the day sitting on the couch, or sleeping.

Now why have I reminded you of all this? Well, it is relevant to my story, so relax, you will understand in a moment, I promise. Even when I go grocery shopping, by the time I get back home and have put everything in its proper place, it is all I can do to get my clothes changed, and make it to the couch. I am pooped for the rest of the day. So later, when we got back to her place and I had unloaded 4 bags of dirt, carrying them to where they needed to be, I was out of breath and my heart was beating strong and fast, from just that little bit of effort. I get worn out very quickly and easily.

But the story of my day is nowhere near over yet.  Backing up a tad bit…  She also wanted to check out a community center where they have fitness equipment and a huge pool. She has been wanting to swim in the strongest of ways for quite some time. So we got there and checked out the pool which was enormous! There was a water slide along with several sections of poolage which all kinda ran together as one. It was gorgeous! Now, since I am on disability, and have a Humana Medicare plan which will pay for a membership at a fitness place that supports the Silver Sneakers program, AND I had been thinking for a long time about how much I love to be in water….long story short – I now have a completely paid-for (not directly by me) membership. It was her intention from the start to get a membership for herself, so…well…she did. Now this pretty much obligates me to take her there several times a week to swim. Seein’ as how I had been loathe to leave my house ’cause frankly, it just seemed like too damned much effort, I really could use the exercise and the time away from my man-cave. Also considering her need for a driver, it seems like a match made in heaven.  Who knows, maybe I can find a girlfriend there….hey, it could happen.

So, by the time I got back home, I was thoroughly pooped! It was a good day though, with some stimulating discussions. At some point, our snarkiness comes into full play as we lament the sorry state of our beloved government, and its fucking total mismanagement of the country, and total corruption, caused by selfishness, complete disregard for the divinity and sanctity of anyone not in their “club”, and their lust for money. Mostly the latter. Then we move on to snarkin’ about how, after all these millennia, and the social awareness that is present in the minds and hearts of so many people today, could there possibly still exist so many miscreants who are chomping at the bit to kill, torture, rape, enslave, control, and commit violence just for fun (more likely for cash)? We moan about our inability to stop wars, racism, and classism, and promote goodwill and brotherly/sisterly love. We agonize in vain for a way to convince people to simply value ALL human life equally and put an end to heinous animal cruelty, and to the masses of starving human beings (most especially the children), while the selfish “Scrouges” sit pretty in their castles counting out their incredible stash of the world’s money. This most terrible human injustice remains uncorrected while the “Beast” continues to have a field day, actively enslaving all humanity.

Yes, it was a VERY good day!

MY VERY OWN PROVOKING THOUGHT FOR THE DAY 05/31/2015

It’s Sunday! Let’s shed a little Light on a subject, shall we?

The “love of money” may be the root of all evil, but I say that the lust for power is its core. Money is the greatest tool in the arsenal of evil, with which to enforce the will of those in power, upon all humanity. Their purpose is to keep us all enslaved, docile, and under their complete control.

The Bible’s book of Revelation was the seer’s best attempt to describe their mystical, spiritual visions to others. Many visions are common for all who walk the path of Enlightenment. These visions symbolize the struggle between the Light and Dark sides of each of our personalities, and of the societies around us. One of the greatest errors of interpretation people can make, is in trying to literally apply these visions to actual events and people. These visions are timeless and apply to all ages, they are allegorical, metaphorical, figurative, but NOT literal. The Jehovah’s Witnesses take, probably, the most literal view of the Bible. How many times now have they predicted the end of the world on a specific date, and been proven wrong? The Bible even says we cannot know the exact time, but that did not stop them from trying! This stubborn tendency, common to all of us, of attempting to do anything we have been told we cannot do, is really quite funny. We are very silly humans sometimes.

For those still anxiously awaiting the coming of Armageddon, it is already happening in the heavens of your soul.  It symbolizes the internal struggle of the forces of light and dark as you wrestle your way towards Unity with God.

Over the years, my understanding of the Beast of Revelation has solidified. At its head or core stand the great banking families of the world, and the financial institutions which execute their will. The rest of the “Beast” includes governments, political systems, economic systems, police forces, the industrial-military complex and all religious authority. This may not be, and probably is not, an all-inclusive list. It is through these, that the whole of humanity is enslaved and controlled. Our heads, as a symbol of our own personal wills, have been lopped off by the “Beast”. We either play the game, and grind out a living for ourselves, earning the money which will allow us to eat; or we just take whatever we want, completely rejecting the system, and eventually get jailed, or our hand chopped off for our effort; or we starve. This is the magnitude of control that the lust for power has produced. There are millions of people who willingly and enthusiastically support this “Beast”. There are millions more who grudgingly submit to the “Beast” out of necessity, but hate the loss of control over their lives, many suffering terribly. There are yet, again, thousands, maybe millions more, who have rejected the authority of the “Beast”, and incarceration, or worse, is the price they pay for their defiance.

These systems of the “Beast” have been presented to us from birth as the highest forms of civilization and pinnacles of human achievement.  We are taught that these institutions are to be honored and obeyed, and many volunteer their lives, out of a sense of duty, to the protection and preservation of these institutions. Yet these same noble institutions have been, and are today the very same which are responsible for all humanity’s wars. Those who follow the path towards Enlightenment recognize these same Powers as the very embodiment of evil.

As one of those who seek Enlightenment, I say that the love of money and the lust for power are literally the root and core of all the evil ever committed by humanity.  They simultaneously are the Will of God as well.  “What God wants, God gets” (Roger Waters, of Pink Floyd fame).  Prove me wrong, if you can.

How’s that for a Sunday sermon!

What do you think?  Agree?  Disagree?  Bored by this thought?  Want to rant, argue, or fight?  Let me know what you think.

I Feel a HUGE Rant Coming On

My spirit dies in tiny slices of desiccated hopes,
Tidbits rendered lifeless by unwelcomed solitude,
I brag of my uniqueness and self-sufficiency,
Spouting the value of freedom from bonds,
All the while suffering dreams of rescue,
While having long ago abandoned all hope of Joy.

This is what we have done to each other,
Created a sham world of superficial relationships,
False outward expressions of outrage, unrest and angst,
Concealing only a dark, silent base of long-dead emotion,
The happy, positive mask of bravado, required of us,
Substituting for the conspicuous absence of loving fulfillment…

 

Shame to human society, whose watchwords are aggression, competition, striving, clawing, forcing, power, fame, kill-or-be-killed. Still, after millennia, the self-serving survival instinct still dominates. We know better, we can envision a world entirely different, we have the means to change – yet we remain as we are. We have abandoned the highest humanity for a pale substitute, each to their own devices, on your own, winner take all – all of what? All of nothing is nothing. What is left when there is no true passion or enjoyment in life, only a false facade of pretended happiness, satisfaction and success. We have created an environment where expressing one’s true pain only leads to ridicule. Where cries of hurt shared, with the hope of meeting compassion and love, bring only accusations of weakness and failure, branding you an outcast, and one to be shunned, isolated and shut away, even attacked. How will this end? Will there be an end of suffering, some unexpected reprieve from the isolated loneliness, or just a long, slow wasting away until death finally ends it? I don’t know. Maybe I will add new verses some day. For now, this is as far as I can see.  Will it end well for humanity?

Let’s Have us a Lewis Carroll Snark Hunt! – for Laurel

See: “The Hunting of the Snark”, Poem by Lewis Carroll

NOTE: many of these words are not mine (at least I would HIGHLY doubt that MY twisted mind was the first to conceive of such words. However, I can see why someone would not want to take credit for inventing said words)! Although, even though I do not have any objective proof, I do believe at least SOME of them to be my originals…or not. That said, I freely give the World complete rights to use any of them, at any time, for any crazy, stupid reason, whatsoever (even the Ministry of Silly Walks), completely royalty free (with exception, of course, of any which have already been copyrighted, of which I am not aware, except for “snark” attributable to the poem mentioned above). Please note all the legal fine print, and read very carefully, embedded in the period at the end of this sentence.

PLEASE feel free to comment, add more words to the repertoire, or generally be snarky. Oh, and don’t forget to like this post, if it tickled your funny bone…or not…

The purpose of this snark hunt is to answer the age-old question:
Which word is now the most versatile in the English (well, American) language, “shit” or “snark”?

All due respect, and honor, to the late George Carlin.

Some aspects of the new Snarkdom:

Descriptive words (or nouns, adjectives, adverbs, participles…actually, any parts of speech):

snarky, snarkily, snarkish, snarkiness, ubersnark,
snarkor, snarker, snarkette, snarkess, snarkerino,
snarking (Oh, this could mean lots of things…how the mind spins with possibilities)

Profanity:

bullsnark
snark you!
snarked in the ass, (this is NOT sexist, everyone has an asshole, and many people ARE assholes)
snitch (gives new meaning to the word)
snastard
snark-of-a-bitch
son-of-a-snark
mother snarker

Sayings:

snark on a bun, snark on a stick, just snark it, snark ‘n spin, just snark it up,

snarknificant to the conversation

ambisnarkterous, snarkelicious, snarkological, snarkegory(-ical), snarkology, snarkophobia, adiposnark, snarktainment,
snarkapade, (“Frodo, my boy, I think it’s time for a new”)snarkventure, snarkepreneur, snarktaneous, snarktankerous (this is me fo’ sho),

Snark Monsters (not to be confused with the “Monster of Snark”):

grendesnark, snarkopturus, Tyrannosnark Sex, Raptorsnark, snarkopods,

Animals:

snarkopotamus, elesnark, snarkedary, snarkfish,
snog (no offense to snogging)(relative of both dog and frog, breeching both worlds),
alisnark, snarkodile,
cats (sorry, snarkiness already comes built-in pre-snarkaged, “cat” and “snark” are synonymous)
murfsnark (small and mostly blueish)

sinnful snuggle snark (very dangerous sex toy)

Let’s go to a Medieval snarkall with Count Snark, Sir Snarkalot, Guinsnarkevere, Gwendelsnark, and etc….

Computers and Internet:

snarkigram, eSnark,

Streaming Snarkiness Channels:

Meer-snark, Ustrnark or just Usnark, Streas.nark, Snarkulu, Netsnark, Snarkeo, Snarkcafe, Veetsnark, LiveSnark, SnarkStream, Bambusnark, SnarkNow, SnarkCast, Perrosnark….

Snarky Social Media:

Snarktwit, Facesnark, Snoogle+, YouSnark, Flicksnark, Snarksquare or Foursnark, Snapsnark, Linkedsnark, Snarkerest, Instasnark,

Snarkelicious Dating Sites:

Snarkmatch, Plenty of Snark (POS), OKSnarky (OKS), Snarkindr, Snarkarmony, OurSnark, Zoosnark, Young Russian Snarks,

Snarkish Musical Genres:

bluesnark, snark & roll, popsnark (not to be confused with the breakfast food),
snarktown, snark&B, snarkpera, snarkibilly,

Snarkiful Songs:

A Snarking we will Go,
A Snarking we will Go….

“Snark Me Baby, One More Time” (my fav)

Snarky Places:

Snarkington, Snarkville, Deutschsnark, Snarkfrica, snarkussia, snarkland (also a theme park), Snarkopolis,

Snarky Persuations:

Britsnark, asiansnark, Eurosnark, blacksnark, whitesnark, dark-brownish-suntanned-snark, redsnark, LGBTsnark, Lesbisnark, femminisnark, Pinksnark, (who haven’t I offended yet? Oh, wait…)

Religious Snarkers:

Buddisnark, Snark Yoga, Hindi Snark, Tao Snark, Christi-snark(Christark), Snarklam, Judasnark…

As it is written, “When two or more snarkers are gathered together snarktaneously, in the name of Snark, they share an unexpected, snarkous snarkendipity”, so it is said, so shall it be done!

Now I really need to attend a Snarkaholics Anonymous (Snarkanon) meeting!!!

So, which word wins? to “shit” or to “snark”, that is the question?

My Dire-y 05/09/2015, Update – TaxACT is TaxJAC’T

I am unhappily writing an update to my dire-y entry from 04/15/2015. I just received a letter from the Ohio Department of Taxation informing me of an error in my tax return. Evidently TaxACT reported $0 for line 9 – exemption credit, which should have been $20. So, the result is that I paid the State $15, when I really owed nothing in taxes. So much for their “lowest tax payment” and “correctness” guarantees.

Now, in Ohio, EVERYONE gets at least one exemption for themselves, and the Ohio tax instructions for line 9 – exemption credit state:

” If Ohio taxable income is less than $30,000, multiply your total number of personal and dependent exemptions by $20 and enter on line 9.”

OK, simple and straightforward enough.  Well, my Ohio taxable income was next to nothing since I am on Social Security disability, and my disability income is not taxable income for me, in Ohio. Therefore, my Ohio taxable income was most definitely less than $30,000!  Since EVERYONE gets at least ONE exemption, I therefore obviously qualify for the $20 exemption amount, TaxACT should have included $20 on line 9 of my return….but they didn’t.

Now, if they had made an error on a line in which there were a murky or debatable definition of the correct amount, it would be somewhat understandable. However, this was a cut-and-dry definition, not subject to interpretation, so the error made is such a blatant one. This is such a simple thing, which has been exactly the same for many years, so I am really dumbfounded.

Since I know my tax situation is rather simple (in fact, I usually enter the data manually myself on Ohio eFile), I trusted that a major tax preparation software company would most definitely do it right. I am frankly quite shocked to discover that they allowed such an obvious error slip past. Ya, ya, I know I am supposed to check their work, I don’t want to hear a lecture about it. But really, if I wanted to go to that effort, I would have done it myself. Since I did not care to put that much effort into it, because I don’t HAVE the energy to put into worrying about doing all those calculations manually, I decided to pay someone else to worry about it for me. I put in the correct numbers (which I did) – and it spits out the “guaranteed” lowest amount of taxes possible.  That’s the way it is supposed to work….Ya, right!

Obviously, I will not be using TaxACT any more to do my taxes, and unfortunately, I can no longer recommend TaxACT to anyone else either.

<dripping sarcasm alert>

I just felt such a tremendous burning desire and keen sense of duty and social responsibility to let everyone know exactly what happened.  So, I just HAD to produce this update!

(You know how much I just LOVE to b*tch….well at least you do now!).

Mark