Tag Archives: Dating

It’s Monday Again…Read With Caution!

(NOTE: Random cat pic has nothing to do with the content of this post.  It is here for the sole (or soul) purpose of attracting your attention).

I don’t have any specific reason for hating Mondays, other than always feeling extra tired and crappy. Haven’t ever figured out why. Maybe always relaxing and taking it easy on weekends produces some “withdrawal” effect or something.

After having accounts on a few dating sites now for about 10-15 years or so, and never getting anywhere I want to go with them, I decided to cancel my accounts. I go through this cycle quite regularly (except for the cancelling part). I send out a bunch of messages to ladies who I think might have some slight interest in getting to know me (let’s say a batch of about 40). I usually get a small number of responses back. At least one or two are from respectful and considerate women informing me that they are indeed NOT in the slightest interested in knowing more about me. I may message back and forth a few times with one or three who suddenly are never to be heard from again. Out of the final one or two, I actually manage to take them out on a “date”…well, at least a “meet and greet”. You know what comes next – at least one of them is a no-match, either from her side or from mine.

If there is anyone left at this point, then I usually get to date her several more times before that final potential relationship goes “south”. At this point, I may decide to give it another go, and send out more messages (it feels too much like applying for a job). By the end of that round I am sure to be disgusted with the whole thing, and crawl back into “Merlin’s” man-cave to spend any number of months practicing the art of living a Hermit’s existence, until loneliness catches up to me and I do it all over again.

So in 10-15 years of sporadic online dating, I have found a couple of acquaintances, but no lasting relationships. Thus, this time I have decided to just give up on the online dating scene (for awhile anyway), as it seems to be working oh, so WELL for me so far. There has to be something better!

So I cancel my OKCupid account, and I surf over to my Plenty Of Fish (POF) account to do the same there, and what do you know….ya, you guessed it – I have a message waiting for me. OK, I do not have a high expectation for this prospect, but I would be remiss if I did not at least check this one out. So far, she does not really “seem” like the type of person who would make a good long-term partner for me, but let’s just keep an open mind to it. All will become evident with time. In one day, we went from messaging to talking on the phone – that is a good sign. I predict that we will meet in person this week sometime. From there, it is anyone’s guess. Who knows, I might actually get “lucky” this time.

So far I have not said anything about all the other incidental frustrations and problems with online dating sites (at least the free ones). There are more than a few men and women simply looking for a hand-out. I understand that our society has made it very difficult for so many people to simply meet their own survival needs, much less thrive as human beings. It does not surprise me at all that there would be so many who are trying to get a little (or lot of) help from others. Of course, some of these people ARE actually just lazy, and want someone to take care of them just like their parents did in the years prior to them getting “booted” out the door by those same disgruntled and thoroughly disgusted parents. Then there are the outright scams to separate the weak and trusting from their hard-earned money. There are all the women from “Ghana”, and the men in the “military” preying on anyone who will listen (these are two of the most common scams I have experienced, or heard women tell about – it does NOT mean that every lady from Ghana, or every military man is a scammer).

Then there are all those just looking for a good time. To tell the truth, most people are ultimately looking for sex, but on one hand are the players of both sexes, and on the other are those who want a sex partner, but who want it to last much longer than just a night or two. There are a small smattering of folks who actually only want a friend (platonic) or a pen pal. The problem with the players is that they never identify themselves up front, it is only after they get what they came for, and vanish into the sunset, that you find out the truth. So, you just have to take your chances. Then there are those who only want to sext, have phone or cyber sex, or just want to trade nudie pics.

So, the whole free dating site scene is not that conducive to finding long-term stable relationship partners unless you are willing to put in the time and effort to weed through the players, scams, and non-matches to get to the rare match. Some are willing to do that, but the level of physical energy I have to put into it is not that great, and we have not yet considered the cost of gas, food, and entertainment that dating requires (I am pretty short on that as well). It is perfectly OK for some people, but just is not working to my advantage.

So I think I will concentrate more on my blog, my health, and my spiritual life, and hope that there is someone left out there for me, and that God will bring us together.

All – in -all, seems like a typical grouchy Monday. Hey, it can only get better from here!

Huh, Well Whaddya Know

This is all brand new to me. As just an ordinary (more or less) person, with no special training in writing or communications, I have been at this now for about 2 months or so. My whole goal was strictly personal, simply to use it as a tool to order my thoughts more clearly, as a result of forcing myself to write them down, and also as a form of therapy. I sorta write the way I talk, and I am not especially worried about correct usage or grammar. In fact I get to swearing at the blasted machine when it highlights all these areas where I need a comma, or more often, when I choose to use one, and it says it is unnecessary, or even incorrect. Ya know, I’m gonna put the blasted commas wherever I damn well please, thank you, and I really don’t care greatly if it is technically correct or not! I would say I don’t give a shit, especially since I am not doing this for popularity, or for money, but honestly, that would be a little too harsh. The matter really is that underneath it all, I really AM somewhat interested in writing something that people will want to read, and I do care that it mostly be (incorrect verb form with personal pronoun) in proper form. I get annoyed myself at people who make common grammatical mistakes, and make common mistakes in word choice. I did get mostly “A”s in high school and college English after all. By using the simple, and sometimes frustrating spell checkers and auto-correction tools, one has no excuse for tons of silly mistakes.  The freakin’ tools are free, for God’s sake, take a second to use them! (this is aimed only at those who don’t, and whose conversations are riddled with mistakes, many of which are mostly unreadable.  Don’t accuse me of targetting YOUR specific writing unless, of course, the shoe fits, or the foo shits, either one).

Everyone thinks their life is boring, or at least uninteresting to anyone else. I am like that too, but I learned something from reading all these blogs that are simply accounts of the ordinary daily occurrences of typical human beings. I found that as long as they are well written, these posts are not nearly as boring or uninteresting as their writers seem to think they are. After about two months of this, I have collected about 60 followers. Now maybe that is peanuts to what a pro would expect, or someone with a large ego, but I never expected anyone, really, to be interested in the daily happenings of my boring life, or the stream-of-consciousness ramblings of my mind, or even the thought-out, serious spiritual posts I have been doing. Feedback has been quite surprising, even shocking. Now eloquent is NOT a word “I” would use to describe any of my writing, but I have been told exactly that, by more than one person (and NOT family, who are at least biased, and possibly obligated to say good things). I have been told that I am funny.  Now, I will agree that sometimes I can be slightly humorous, but not ROTFLMAO funny. Also people have commented that I am either intellectual, or insightful.  Again, I would slightly agree that my serious posts are somewhat intellectual, especially the spiritual ones. The whole point of this paragraph is that, the seemingly ordinary and boring occurrences of our lives, are actually much more interesting to others than we realize (as long as they are at least somewhat well written). Also, that evidently I am a lot more interesting, funny, and insightful than I ever would have given myself credit for being. One conclusion that can be postulated is that blogging CAN be an effective way to bolster your self-esteem, and combat loneliness and depression.

One of my close friends, who I love, told me that blogging can be a great way to meet people, and as a result, actually form romantic relationships with them.  One thing I suffer terribly with, (improper comma between subject and verb) is loneliness.  I have been very lonely, for a very long time, not to mention the state of my sex life!  I never(incorrect placement of negative adverb, well fuck me!) would have thought of blogging as a dating tool, but my friend insisted that it can be done, after all, I met HER that way! (insert snide smiley….Oops, emoji, here).  So ladies, feel free to contact me (even if it isn’t for a date), and DO comment on my posts.  Guys, you are welcome to contact me or comment on my posts, but we will not be dating (that’s just me).

I certainly never set out to collect any certain type of follower.  If anything, I was just curious if anybody would read my crap.  I have, however, collected a number of people who suffer from bipolar disorder, which I understand, and have experience with as a social worker in a group home setting.  This was in the past, but not that long ago, and I worked at it for 6 years.  To those followers I want to say…if you think your life is something that nobody would be interested in reading about…the normal daily events of a person with bipolar disorder, are anything BUT boring or uninteresting.  In some cases, those events can be incredibly entertaining, and informative, to the reader (although a tough struggle to live through).  Never think that your courage in bringing your private lives to the public will remain unnoticed and/or unappreciated, or that the events of your lives have even the slightest chance of boring your audience!  Keep up the illuminating and helpful work you are doing.

Huh, well whaddya know, I never would have thought anyone would actually ENJOY reading the stuff I write!  Thank you all for following my blog, (incorrect use of comma) and for giving me so much unexpected and surprising (to me) feedback.  Peace, Love, and Happiness to you all!

Let’s Have us a Lewis Carroll Snark Hunt! – for Laurel

See: “The Hunting of the Snark”, Poem by Lewis Carroll

NOTE: many of these words are not mine (at least I would HIGHLY doubt that MY twisted mind was the first to conceive of such words. However, I can see why someone would not want to take credit for inventing said words)! Although, even though I do not have any objective proof, I do believe at least SOME of them to be my originals…or not. That said, I freely give the World complete rights to use any of them, at any time, for any crazy, stupid reason, whatsoever (even the Ministry of Silly Walks), completely royalty free (with exception, of course, of any which have already been copyrighted, of which I am not aware, except for “snark” attributable to the poem mentioned above). Please note all the legal fine print, and read very carefully, embedded in the period at the end of this sentence.

PLEASE feel free to comment, add more words to the repertoire, or generally be snarky. Oh, and don’t forget to like this post, if it tickled your funny bone…or not…

The purpose of this snark hunt is to answer the age-old question:
Which word is now the most versatile in the English (well, American) language, “shit” or “snark”?

All due respect, and honor, to the late George Carlin.

Some aspects of the new Snarkdom:

Descriptive words (or nouns, adjectives, adverbs, participles…actually, any parts of speech):

snarky, snarkily, snarkish, snarkiness, ubersnark,
snarkor, snarker, snarkette, snarkess, snarkerino,
snarking (Oh, this could mean lots of things…how the mind spins with possibilities)

Profanity:

bullsnark
snark you!
snarked in the ass, (this is NOT sexist, everyone has an asshole, and many people ARE assholes)
snitch (gives new meaning to the word)
snastard
snark-of-a-bitch
son-of-a-snark
mother snarker

Sayings:

snark on a bun, snark on a stick, just snark it, snark ‘n spin, just snark it up,

snarknificant to the conversation

ambisnarkterous, snarkelicious, snarkological, snarkegory(-ical), snarkology, snarkophobia, adiposnark, snarktainment,
snarkapade, (“Frodo, my boy, I think it’s time for a new”)snarkventure, snarkepreneur, snarktaneous, snarktankerous (this is me fo’ sho),

Snark Monsters (not to be confused with the “Monster of Snark”):

grendesnark, snarkopturus, Tyrannosnark Sex, Raptorsnark, snarkopods,

Animals:

snarkopotamus, elesnark, snarkedary, snarkfish,
snog (no offense to snogging)(relative of both dog and frog, breeching both worlds),
alisnark, snarkodile,
cats (sorry, snarkiness already comes built-in pre-snarkaged, “cat” and “snark” are synonymous)
murfsnark (small and mostly blueish)

sinnful snuggle snark (very dangerous sex toy)

Let’s go to a Medieval snarkall with Count Snark, Sir Snarkalot, Guinsnarkevere, Gwendelsnark, and etc….

Computers and Internet:

snarkigram, eSnark,

Streaming Snarkiness Channels:

Meer-snark, Ustrnark or just Usnark, Streas.nark, Snarkulu, Netsnark, Snarkeo, Snarkcafe, Veetsnark, LiveSnark, SnarkStream, Bambusnark, SnarkNow, SnarkCast, Perrosnark….

Snarky Social Media:

Snarktwit, Facesnark, Snoogle+, YouSnark, Flicksnark, Snarksquare or Foursnark, Snapsnark, Linkedsnark, Snarkerest, Instasnark,

Snarkelicious Dating Sites:

Snarkmatch, Plenty of Snark (POS), OKSnarky (OKS), Snarkindr, Snarkarmony, OurSnark, Zoosnark, Young Russian Snarks,

Snarkish Musical Genres:

bluesnark, snark & roll, popsnark (not to be confused with the breakfast food),
snarktown, snark&B, snarkpera, snarkibilly,

Snarkiful Songs:

A Snarking we will Go,
A Snarking we will Go….

“Snark Me Baby, One More Time” (my fav)

Snarky Places:

Snarkington, Snarkville, Deutschsnark, Snarkfrica, snarkussia, snarkland (also a theme park), Snarkopolis,

Snarky Persuations:

Britsnark, asiansnark, Eurosnark, blacksnark, whitesnark, dark-brownish-suntanned-snark, redsnark, LGBTsnark, Lesbisnark, femminisnark, Pinksnark, (who haven’t I offended yet? Oh, wait…)

Religious Snarkers:

Buddisnark, Snark Yoga, Hindi Snark, Tao Snark, Christi-snark(Christark), Snarklam, Judasnark…

As it is written, “When two or more snarkers are gathered together snarktaneously, in the name of Snark, they share an unexpected, snarkous snarkendipity”, so it is said, so shall it be done!

Now I really need to attend a Snarkaholics Anonymous (Snarkanon) meeting!!!

So, which word wins? to “shit” or to “snark”, that is the question?

Review of the “Tinder” Android App

The only part of the Tinder dating app that I like, is that it pi**ed me off so bad I just HAD to write this review. I just LOVE to B*tch! A shortened “Short Version” was published in the Google Play Store for this app, but because of space limitations on reviews there, I post both short and complete versions of my review here, of this (mostly) useless app.

SHORT VERSION:

This app is not even worth downloading and trying. And, for your own sake, do not buy it! The other free dating sites/apps, “Plenty Of Fish”, (POF), and “OKCupid”, (OKC), are infinitely more useful, and you can get dates, completely for free.

First, many people include NO information, only pics. Not much to go on, leading to many frustrating failures to “launch”.

The policy of “once you throw a person away, they are gone forever”, is the stupidest policy ever. Do you make mistakes? (If you PAY, you can get back the last mistake only. How generous of them!)

You are forced to give tinder your phone number to use the app, and can only ever create ONE account with that number, No do-overs if you make a mistake.

The user interface is designed in such a way that you can easily, INADVERTENTLY, throw away multiple people/profiles, before stopping yourself. You never got a chance to explore them at all. See my Google+ login for the full review which I will post there because space limitations have “Scroogled” (most likely copyright Microsoft Corp.) me here in the Google Play Store.

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LONG VERSION WITH DETAILS:

This app is not even worth downloading and trying. And, for your own sake, do not buy it! The other free dating sites/apps, “Plenty Of Fish”, (POF), and “OKCupid”, (OKC), hereinafter known as “the others”, are infinitely more useful, and you can get dates, completely for free (they also have paid premium versions).

First, “the others” prompt you to enter the important stuff that people want to see, and search against, to find suitable matches, such as age, smoking status, height, pets, children… and so on. Tinder allows you to write a profile, but you are all on your own, you completely control how much information is presented, or non at all, and must remember to include the important stuff people want to see (or not at all). Now personally, I need to see/search on certain information in order to have a viable match at all – it isn’t there in most profiles. These are my own personal “Deal Breakers”. We all have them, and not all that info is based on looks, or can be seen in the pics. So, if some decide to leave it out, you either dump them in the “Bucket”, or go ahead with the match, and hope that later, at least ONE of them will meet your dating criteria. Also, there is no searching in tinder, you only get to choose a few little details, like how far from your location you want the search to cover, but for the most part, you only see what they want you to see, no user choice. The others DO.

The worst part, for me is their policy that once you throw a profile into the “bit bucket”(throw them away), except for only the very LAST one you threw away, and then only if you PAY, is the most idiotic, asinine, stupid, manipulative, limiting, policy, I have ever had the opportunity to encounter. What dater in their right mind wants to PERMANENTLY delete choices, which there is no way of ever getting back? Certainly not me. You may start out keeping only the “best” matches for you, only to regret that decision later, when none of THEM want to date YOU!

The app actually does what they say it does. BUT: one method of looking through a person’s multiple pics is by “left swiping” through them. Well, by design, the “left swipe” is also one method used to permanently throw people into the “trash”. If, while you are “left swiping” through a person’s pics, you inadvertently happen to tap on the screen just slightly a little too much, the display reverts to the selection screen, and the person you were looking at, swiping through their pics, is now, unintentionally deleted forever. Now, if you happen to be quickly “left swiping” through multiple pics of the same person (as I tried to do), and don’t catch yourself quickly enough, you end up discarding, forever, multiple choices you didn’t mean to throw away. This is the most idiotic user interface design I have ever, in my long programming career, seen. Stupid, stupid, stupid. If you want to be totally frustrated trying to find a date, then by all means, download away!

Oh, did I mention that I tried to create a second account, to start fresh? Well, I did TRY, and as long as you are on the same phone, it isn’t allowed, you simply can’t do it. You are REQUIRED to give your cell phone number to tinder in order to get an account (so they can set up an anonymous connection between users, using your phone’s text messaging), which I consider an invasion of my privacy. I have not given my number to any of “the others”. I have not tried creating a new account on a different phone, mainly because I have only ONE, and I am surely not going to buy a new one just to start over on tinder. All around, I give tinder only one star. I would have given less, but really, in good conscience, I can’t, because regardless of the difficulties and frustrations, the app does what they claim it does, and in the end, it IS possible to get a date for free with this app (at least I think it is).

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