(NOTE: Random cat pic has nothing to do with the content of this post. It is here for the sole (or soul) purpose of attracting your attention).
I don’t have any specific reason for hating Mondays, other than always feeling extra tired and crappy. Haven’t ever figured out why. Maybe always relaxing and taking it easy on weekends produces some “withdrawal” effect or something.
After having accounts on a few dating sites now for about 10-15 years or so, and never getting anywhere I want to go with them, I decided to cancel my accounts. I go through this cycle quite regularly (except for the cancelling part). I send out a bunch of messages to ladies who I think might have some slight interest in getting to know me (let’s say a batch of about 40). I usually get a small number of responses back. At least one or two are from respectful and considerate women informing me that they are indeed NOT in the slightest interested in knowing more about me. I may message back and forth a few times with one or three who suddenly are never to be heard from again. Out of the final one or two, I actually manage to take them out on a “date”…well, at least a “meet and greet”. You know what comes next – at least one of them is a no-match, either from her side or from mine.
If there is anyone left at this point, then I usually get to date her several more times before that final potential relationship goes “south”. At this point, I may decide to give it another go, and send out more messages (it feels too much like applying for a job). By the end of that round I am sure to be disgusted with the whole thing, and crawl back into “Merlin’s” man-cave to spend any number of months practicing the art of living a Hermit’s existence, until loneliness catches up to me and I do it all over again.
So in 10-15 years of sporadic online dating, I have found a couple of acquaintances, but no lasting relationships. Thus, this time I have decided to just give up on the online dating scene (for awhile anyway), as it seems to be working oh, so WELL for me so far. There has to be something better!
So I cancel my OKCupid account, and I surf over to my Plenty Of Fish (POF) account to do the same there, and what do you know….ya, you guessed it – I have a message waiting for me. OK, I do not have a high expectation for this prospect, but I would be remiss if I did not at least check this one out. So far, she does not really “seem” like the type of person who would make a good long-term partner for me, but let’s just keep an open mind to it. All will become evident with time. In one day, we went from messaging to talking on the phone – that is a good sign. I predict that we will meet in person this week sometime. From there, it is anyone’s guess. Who knows, I might actually get “lucky” this time.
So far I have not said anything about all the other incidental frustrations and problems with online dating sites (at least the free ones). There are more than a few men and women simply looking for a hand-out. I understand that our society has made it very difficult for so many people to simply meet their own survival needs, much less thrive as human beings. It does not surprise me at all that there would be so many who are trying to get a little (or lot of) help from others. Of course, some of these people ARE actually just lazy, and want someone to take care of them just like their parents did in the years prior to them getting “booted” out the door by those same disgruntled and thoroughly disgusted parents. Then there are the outright scams to separate the weak and trusting from their hard-earned money. There are all the women from “Ghana”, and the men in the “military” preying on anyone who will listen (these are two of the most common scams I have experienced, or heard women tell about – it does NOT mean that every lady from Ghana, or every military man is a scammer).
Then there are all those just looking for a good time. To tell the truth, most people are ultimately looking for sex, but on one hand are the players of both sexes, and on the other are those who want a sex partner, but who want it to last much longer than just a night or two. There are a small smattering of folks who actually only want a friend (platonic) or a pen pal. The problem with the players is that they never identify themselves up front, it is only after they get what they came for, and vanish into the sunset, that you find out the truth. So, you just have to take your chances. Then there are those who only want to sext, have phone or cyber sex, or just want to trade nudie pics.
So, the whole free dating site scene is not that conducive to finding long-term stable relationship partners unless you are willing to put in the time and effort to weed through the players, scams, and non-matches to get to the rare match. Some are willing to do that, but the level of physical energy I have to put into it is not that great, and we have not yet considered the cost of gas, food, and entertainment that dating requires (I am pretty short on that as well). It is perfectly OK for some people, but just is not working to my advantage.
So I think I will concentrate more on my blog, my health, and my spiritual life, and hope that there is someone left out there for me, and that God will bring us together.
All – in -all, seems like a typical grouchy Monday. Hey, it can only get better from here!